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Report Card: Memphis Grizzlies Vs. Portland Trail Blazers - Get the Funk Out Edition

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No Conley...no problem. The Grizzlies showed up and showed out, winning against one of the West's best. Here's how the boys in Beale Street Blue did.

In honor of "Uptown Funk," a pretty groovy song that my son loves to dance to and the number one song on ITunes this week, here are your Grizz grades with classic funk comparisons. And if you don't believe me...just watch...

(Note...I dig this song, and I hope more popular music goes in this direction....but isn't this song just a carbon copy of this classic?)

(Also note...Is there anyone more America than James Brown???)

Grizz Grades

The Coach

Dave Joeger

Grade: A

Charles Wright and The Watts 103rd Street Band- Express Yourself

Six seconds left in the first half...Udrih gets a rebound and takes the ball past mid court and calls a timeout.  The resulting out of bounds play works beautifully, as it usually does this season, and Beno scores on an easy layup.  Is there anybody better at out of timeout plays than HCDJ???

The Starters

Beno Udrih

17 PTS | 7-7 FGA | 3 AST | 7 REBS | +14

Grade: A

The Isley Brother- It's Your Thing

Seven of seven from the field, and two straight daggers right in Damian Lillard's face.  Beno was absolutely ballin' in this one.  Point guard has been a weakness on this Grizzlies team for many many many many many many years (did I mention many).  There is no one that fits the role as a backup for Mike Conley better than Beno Udrih.  The offense just flows so well, even with Captain Clutch out.  Beno has also developed a nice two man game with Marc Gasol.  So knew that this back up point guard conundrum would be solved by a 37 year old guy who was cut by the Knicks?

Courtney Lee

17 PTS | 6-13 FGA | 4-6 3PA | +5

Grade: A-

The Ohio Players- Fire

Courtney Lee had a week of FIRE!!!!!!!  Played very well and did what he does best...SHOOTS THE BALL!!!!!  Big shots in this one as well, going 4-6 from three.

Tony Allen

2 PTS | 1-4 FGA | 1 STL | +5

Grade: B-

Sly and the Family Stone- Thank You

Thank you for being yourself, Tony.  Trick or Treat was in full effect tonight, with the balance on the trick side.  Its always best to stay in the middle with TA...not too hot...not too cold....

Fun fact about tonight's game: The Trailblazers scored 96 points.  Three Blazers starters: (LMA, Lillard, and Matthews) had 80 of those 96.  80!

Zach Randolph

20 PTS | 6-13 FGA | 15 REBS | 3 OREBS |-1

Grade: A

ZBo gets two...just because...

The Commodores- Brick House

Congratulations to ZBo for becoming the all time leading rebounder in a Grizzlies uniform.  It takes a lot of bricks to become the leader in rebounds.  We are going to miss that man's game one day.

Bobby Womack- Across 110th Street

Randolph has had quite a week.  After returning from a knee injury , ZBo posted double doubles in every game this week.  Tonight he worked over the Trailblazer front court, posting a double double by halftime, and getting most of the guys guarding him in foul trouble.  We forget sometime that Zach likes playing against teams he used to play for, and especially likes showing up young stars like LMA.  Watching him battle and trash talk with Aldridge was a special reminder of what a great player we have had here in Memphis in Zach Randolph.

Marc Gasol

15 PTS | 7-14 FGA | 8 REBS | 6 AST | 3 BLKS | +4

Grade: A

The Delphonics- Didn't I Blow Your Mind (This Time)

The Delphonics are the best.

Marc Gasol is also the best.

Enough said.

The Bench

Jeff Green

17 PTS | 6-14 FGA | 3-5 3PA | 5 REBS | 1 AST | -4

Grade: A

Michael Jackson- Don't Stop Till You Get Enough

Has any players gotten more love faster from Memphis fans than Jeff Green?  He had a great night tonight, contributing to almost every big play in the game not made by Beno, including this lovely play on the most unorthodox of fast breaks.

Just stunning.  He has quieted many of his early detractors by coming in games and fitting a need that the Grizzlies have...which is athleticism.  Here is to hoping that this really does keep up.

Vince Carter

6 PTS | 2-5 FGA | 1-3 3PA | +1

Grade: B-

George Clinton and Parliment Funkadelic- Stomp

In the name of positivity, I am going to completely ignore the way VC has played as of late, although he had a little more bounce in his step tonight though.  What I want to focus on is discovering George Clinton.  When I was a young lad, I was a teenager in the topsy turvy decade of the 1990's.  Even though my parents raised me well, I had no background in the work of P-Funk.  However, I had my own television in my room and two major cable channels: MTV and Comedy Central.  I saw Clinton in the Ice Cube video for Bop Gun, and I saw Clinton's guest appearance in the movie PCU, which played at least eighteen to twenty hours a day on Comedy Central in the days before South Park. For thos of you who do not know, PCU is like a 90's version of Animal House, except in PCU we have to believe that Jeremy Piven was ever young.

Anywho...why do I bring this up???  I found a DVD copy of PCU and got it for my wife for Christmas (Yes I know...I freakin' rule as a husband).  The DVD is so old that there is no menu.  The movie just starts playing when you press play, and when the movie ends it starts over again.

What does any of this have to do with Vince Carter?

Carter began his NBA career four years after PCU came out in theaters.

Nick Calathes

2 PTS | 1-3 FGA | 4 ASTS | 2 STL | -8

Grade: B-

The Ohio Players- Love Rollercoaster

I am a full initiate, member, and elder in The Church of Nick.  And tonight I must admit...while Nicky presents a different set of skills from the other two point guards, Beno is a much more well-suited player for this team.  Not that Calathes has been bad, just Beno has been better.  So this season has been a rollercoaster for me and my love for Nicky Baskets.  What a great problem to have though.

Oh...and can we hook up Wolfman Jack's hair guy with Nick?

Kosta Koufus

6 PTS | 3-4 FGA | 7 REBS | +8

Grade: A

Al Green- I'm a Ram

K2 has had a sneaky good week, going from the Grizzly most likely traded to one of the more important Grizzlies on the bench, especially in the last two games with a short bench and a small rotation.

Mike Conley- DNP- Injured

Jordan Adams- DNP CD

Jon Leuer- DNP CD

Jarnell Stokes- DNP CD

Russ Smith- DNP WHAT IT DO?

Three Observations

1) This game felt like a big win

2) Is Portland really good or are the Grizzlies just a bad matchup/better?

3) Do you know how proud I am to have not used Play Some Funky Music???  Especially for Nicky Buckets???