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Grizzlies/Jazz Game Diary: The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y NIGHT...HEY!...in Utah, where the Grizzlies just could not get it done.

Enough said.
Enough said.
Russ Isabella-USA TODAY Sports

I have not written for GBB since October 28th.  I have not done a Game recap since March, mostly because of the Matty B curse, in which I have recapped some terrible losses.  The Grizzlies were 3-15 last year when I recapped.   And yet...here I am...

Like Jordan wearing the 45...

Now...I wish I could say that I have caught up with all the goings on with the boys in Beale Street Blue, but I have not.  So I'm walking into this game blind.  Like I've been unfrozen from the ice.  I'm just a simple Grit-n-Grind blogger, confused by your ways and new NBA strategy...

...but I do know I can keep a running diary for this one.  Here we go...

First Quarter

12:00- The Grizzlies are starting Conley, Lee, Allen, Green, and Gasol. Is ZBo hurt?? Did he die??? What’s up with this.

*checks internet

Oh…I get it…small ball lineup. Hope this goes over well.

- The Jazz start John Stockton’s shortest shorts, 2 Karl Malone hunting rifles, Shawn Bradley, and the only Jazz musician in the entire state of Utah. He’s 95 years old, blind, and has no idea he lives in the boringest place on earth.

- Seriously…what the hell is this lineup for the Jazz?

11:39- Jeff Green fouls and sucks…never gets old.

11:32- Wait…Matt Barnes is suspended?? What did he do? Technical fouls?? PEDs? Punch an old man Derek Fisher?

*checks Instagram

Oh God…

10:37- CLee for three followed by a TA steal and totally not blown layup. Man I could get used to this. Please tell me this happens all the time.

9:39- CLee at the FT line. What’s up with his hair?? Look man…we call go through this stage…most times its in college though.  As a matter of fact, both you and Mike are starting to look a little...

Humpty-ish?

8:36- Rodney Hood basket. Someone check on Mullinax and make sure he hasn’t got the vapors.

7:23- TA FOR 3??? No seriously…TA FOR THREE!!!!! Did I show up in an alternate universe tonight??? Should I email Steven Hawking?? Neil deGrasse Tyson?? Leonard Nimoy??? I’M NOT SURE WHAT SHOULD DO WITH MY HANDS.

6:30- Someone should check on TA’s ankles, cause Gordon Heyward may have broke them a little.

- ZBo checks in for the first time for #5. Glad he’s not dead. Jeff and Zach should be great next to each other, right?

4:47- First time out. Grizzlies are down three, which seems less than optimal for playing a D-league team.

3:00- Rodney Hoods hits another three. Hope Mullinax is wearing a dark suit tonight.

- During the commercial, it comes across Twitter that Grizzlies assistant coach Bob Thornton is out after taki                 elbow to the eye from something called a Ryan Hollins. I though they cut him. He’s not much more than a seven foot tall traffic cone.

2:06- The Jazz got a guy named TIBOR in the lineup. The hell???

0:54- Who in the holy hell is #6???

*Checks the internets*

No freaking way

How did Beno fans take this one??

How did Tiger fans take this one?

*checks Twitter*

About as well as expected. Cool

Wait…do I need to even ask about Russdiculous??

F$&#^#

End of Quarter- Grizz down three. Should have scheduled South Carolina. I heard that was a hell of a game.

2nd Quarter

12:00- Baby Races on a Saturday night in Utah. As close to gambling as you can get.

Heard that the sheriff came out and had to calm everyone down from all their raucous behavior. Those baby races are lit.

11:35- TIBOR SHOT CLOCK VIOLATED!

10:56- Seems as less than optimal that a players has met his career high in points and rebounds this early, BUT THAT IS THAT TIBOR LYFE…

10:45- Grizzlies call a timeout. Brevin praises HCDJ’s use of the time out. Gonna be a long night.

My kid just walked up to me and asked me to read with him. Think I will. Probably won’t miss much.

8:28- *Checks the score* I made the right choice.

Hey kiddo…wanna color???

7:42- Checks back in…JaM has a cut on his arm. Hardest work a Grizzly has put in tonight was the medical guys closing his cut. Fun times. Think I’ll color some more.

6:03- Alright…I’m back with the kid in my lap…just as Jeff Green and my boy TIBOR have checked back in. I missed nothing.

5:06- NO MR. OFFICIAL…YOUR SCREEN WAS ILLEGAL…TIBOR IS BEST

4:42- Gasol jumper makes it 42-35. Just a quick observation: Watching the two offenses tonight. The Jazz have some quick ball movement and seem to have purpose and direction for every pass at times. The Grizzlies offense, however, is slow and choppy and if a basket is made it seems to be a happy accident.

3:00- ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz

2:42- ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

1:00- Grizz making their move here and got their first lead with a MC three. Helps that the Jazz seem to be out of post players and have lost their TIBOR magic. Nice to see the team show some life.

Halftime- Grizz down one. I need to do something that’s more exciting than this game and the Grizzlies performance. I’m sure there is some paint drying somewhere around here.

Third Quarter

12:00- It would help if the Grizz have a good third quarter. That’s something they do, right???

9:47- C Lee a hoop and a foul. Meanwhile, my son sits on the coffee table and screams at the TV "BALL…GO HOME." Not sure why but I think he’s got head coach written all over him.

6:45- This is the boringest Grizzlies game I have watched all year.

Yes…I am your dad.

6:05- Quite a sequence by TA. Cuts to the basket and gets a pass from #33, misses the layup, steals the rebound, makes the put back, and gets fouled. TA must be living right tonight. Cracker Barrel breakfast for everyone!

5:24- Conversation at my house:

My Mrs.- Booger? Did he just say Booger???

Me: Booker. Trevor Booker.

My Mrs- Oh…

4:04- Gordon Heyward of the swoop haircut shoots and air ball and gets hit with the air ball chant…at home. I feel fulfilled.

0:48- Late three by CLee gives the Grizzlies a nice lead. They won the quarter. Who knew!

End of Quarter- Grizzlies up 69 (giggle)-66.

This is the type of humor I make the big bucks for.

Fourth Quarter

12:00- Grizzlies are good when leading in the 4th. Should be fun.

11:49- ONCE AGAIN MR OFFICIAL…YOU’RE SCREENS ARE ILLEGAL. THE TIBOR HAS SPOKEN.

Grizzlies come out with the flying lineup of death- 11, 5, 32, 50, and 20. 20 is immediately scored on by TIBOR. Sigh…

10:10- If the Grizzlies lose this one, their punishment should be to shoot free throws until their arms fall off, followed by having to walk to the best nightclub in Utah…which is in Vegas.

8:36- Grizzlies getting worked down two. HCDJ nearly walks to half court to call timeout. He’s pissed. Not Quinn Snyder pissed though. That dude is scary. He’s like a slightly orange Hulk minus the shorts.

7:30- Rodney Hood turnover on an offensive foul. Grizz twitter is all divided up over the Adams/Hood draft from two years ago. If the Grizzlies had drafted Hood there’s no telling how little he may have played until he got cut to sign Ryan Hollins.

5:40- Rodney Hood Draft Night Revenge Game? He’s beating the Grizzlies like the stole from him.

3:40- TA steal leads to a two shot foul. TA has been the best Grizz all night.

Under 3:00- Memphis is 3-18 from the field in the quarter, but they are fortunate to be only down by one. This should be a good end, but it will probably be like prom- awkward and no one socres.

1:39- Whitey Whitney Whithit Whitzit Withey scores to put the Jazz up three following a terrible defensive possession by Green and Gasol.

1:21- Gasol gets fouled and makes both free throws. Grizz down one.

0:42- After a Jazz air-ball (by someone who sucks…didn’t even see who shot nor do I care), Lee makes a shot on a mismatch with Trevor Booker, who looks like the middle picture of a Glen Davis Slim-Fast commercial. Not the after, but in the process. Grizzlies take the lead by one.

0:28- Foul by Jeff Green on the Biggest Grizzlies Draft Mistake EVER! Hood makes one free throw and ties it up. BTW…Hood is not even close to the biggest draft mistake by the Grizzlies. Here’s the list, in reverse order:

3) Tony Wroten over Draymond Green. Not saying the Green would have been here what he is in Golden State, but there was not a more perfect player to learn from ZBo.

2) Hasheem Thabeet over everyone not named Johnny Flynn.

1) Trading for Otis Thorpe.

0:01- Gasol with the excellent look that doesn’t fall. The Jazz get less than a second and miss. We get more basketball. See my excitement.

OOOOOOVERTIME

4:45- Whitney Withey fouls out. Will someone please posterize this dude out of the league. Where’s Shawn Kemp when we need him?

4:02- Gasol scores again, making the score 87-86, then stuff Heyward on the opposite end.

2:58- Hood misses a three. Are we sure he doesn’t already play for the Grizzlies???

1:47- TIBOR misses. Grizz still up one.

1:24- Jeff Green shot clock violation- the Prom offense is in full effec.  Can I go to bed now?

1:08- Trevor Booker finally puts one in and breaks the scoreless streak.

0:45- Gasol miss followed by a Jazz timeout.

0:28- Foul by #11 on the GOAT Hood. Crowd is singing Journey during the timeout. Can I go to bed now?

Jazz up by two

0:16- Conley gets a good look at the basket and misses. Marc is out-rebounded by Moses Malone Trevor Booker. Foul.

Jazz up three.

I swear I heard them play Jackyl during the timeout.

0:02- Conley dribbles for what feels like forever and eventually gets the ball by crook to CLee, who shoots a three by leaning into his defender. Draws neither the foul or makes the shot.

Some observations:

- Did the Grizzlies do anything well last night??? Prom offense and they did not seem to know who was supposed to be where on defense.

- 45 minutes of playing time for Marc.  I know they had three days off before and the game went to overtime, but man.  I thought Ryan Hollins was supposed to take up some PT.

- I think the team really missed Matt Barnes.  Re-read that sentence.

0:00 Grizz lose and the Matty B Curse lives.

My bad y'all...I'll take the blame for this one.

Till next time...

Auf Baby

Follow @sbngrizzlies